Trouble has been brewing on the hill for a few days. Money is tight, stress levels are high, CJ's hubby, BJ got hurt on the job and is home. His foot is in a cast and he's on crutches, waiting to see an ortho doctor.
Kids don't mind, Stacie and CJ think the kids should do it all while they study on the computers, but kids are kids and will do just what they can get by with. CJ and BJ don't want Casey staying in the sheddage with Ana, so they keep her up at Stacies.
Yesterday Stacie and I went shopping all day, when she came in and walked in with her arms full of groceries they are sitting on the couch watching tv, nothing done all day long..they being CJ and BJ.
They have words.
This morning Dylan comes down with a pair of the girls' socks on and I ask where his socks are..he can't find them. I know why. He never puts his clothes away, never puts them in a clothes basket. The room he moved into was a mess and has become more of a mess.
Today Ana began the chore of gathering up the rest of her clothes from the room Dylan has been sleeping in. I go up to help and am horrified at the mess in there, so I call Dylan in and give him a good talking to. I came down the hill, tended to my chores, ate a bite and then went back up there. I told him we would clean that room and even though he wanted to stand around with his finger up his butt, he did help.
After a while his mom and dad came into the room. I told them what I was doing and that it wasn't my place to do it but the grown ups in the house wouldn't so I was.
He had an electric heater piled on top of clothes and I know he has run it at night..so unsafe. I took it out and I told them he didn't need a heater in that room. He could cover up and get warm.
Stacie had asked CJ and BJ to stop sleeping in the living room-either BJ or Casey was always in there, so they took Casey into their room with them. Stacie told them if DHS got wind of it there would be trouble. CJ read it as Stacie was threatening to contact DHS. Emotions ran high.
Between Stacie, Ana, Dylan and myself we cleaned up that room. At one point, BJ and CJ came in and asked if they could talk. They told me about their problems with Stacie and I listened, but made no comment. BJ wanted to know if anything Stacie was saying was coming from 'down the hill', meaning from me and Paw. I assured him that whatever I had to say I'd say to their face. We discussed the Casey/shed issue, BJ not wanting Casey to stay down here, reason being he knows what he did at her age, etc. I told them they had the right to decide I wouldn't argue that with them. For now though, Ana was staying in the shed.
They then left and went to CJ's grandmas for Christmas. We finished up the room brought an extra mattress for Casey to sleep on, brought Ana's desk and a coffee table down, then took Casey's clothes and her chest back up the hill, into the house and into the room. We noticed beneath a desk in the living room were some of Casey's clothes just dumped on the floor. I thought Stacie would bust a gasket. Seems Casey had simply dumped them there because her chest was down the hill. I know through out the week when I would be up there Stacie or CJ would tell the kids to do something with that basket of clothes and point toward about 3 baskets of clothes. I also know there was a pile of laundry by the washer that would have challenged a small washateria.
So....the Pattersons are gone, Stacie is working on her living room, I take Ana to spend the night with a friend. I come back, wash my dishes, put on my soup, put some sweet potatoes in the oven, sit for a few minutes and start this email when a text message comes in--u are needed.
Grumbling I head up the hill, not realizing the Pattersons are back until I see Dylan outside with Shandi. I go in, find Stacie in her room crying. Seems Casey has come in and told Stacie she is a fatty and no one likes her and they can't wait to leave from there. CJ, BJ and Casey are holed up in their room.
I go back there, open the curtain and tell them I would like for all of them to come into the living room. We need to talk. Casey sits there while BJ and CJ gets up. She sits there with her head down. Come on Casey, I say, no answer. Her mom and her dad speak to her and finally she says to BJ, I am waiting on you. He won't move until she does so she grudgingly gets up and walks into the living room.
I talk to them about communication, blah, blah.......finally Stacie and CJ apologize to each other.
Then I turn my attention to Casey
Me: Casey why did you call my daughter a fatty and say ugly things to her
Casey: head down, not looking up, no answer
CJ: Answer her, Casey
Casey...no response
BJ: Answer Ms Klara
Casey: no response
Me: And that is part of the problem. Casey you either won't reply or you smart off and tell me it's none of my business or you give me an answer a mile long with all your excuses as to why you did whatever
CJ: Casey thinks no one loves her here
Me: Well I don't know what else I can do. I refuse to kiss her ass. Otherwise I've done everything I know to do to make her feel welcome
At this point Casey finally barks out something and for the life of me I can't recall what it was she said but whatever it was, it pissed me off big time because of HOW she said it.
So I say: I will not tolerate being spoken to that way. You are always saying we take Ana's side, you say Ana gets her way, yet YOU take your phone to school
Casey" Ana takes her too
Then there is a back and forth on whether or not Ana takes her phone.
Me: Well she may take it when I don't know, but all you have to do is say she has it. I will handle it. On the other hand you got yours taken, you raised the money to get it back, your mother had Stacie take her to school to get the phone.......at this point I see CJ bury her head in her hand and Casey looked like she would die.
I continue...your mother said you would NOT get your phone back but the next morning you not only had it but took it to school and you say Ana gets her way...I look at CJ when I say this because it's CJ who always says Ana gets her way. Not only does all the above occur, but then your mother gave you the money to pay your friends back.
At this point Casey yells...She did not. I earned that money babysitting Dylan and Shandi.
Me: Wow, how wonderful. Your mother pays you 25.00 to babysit Dylan and Shandi but all Ana got was a box of Zebra cakes. Now WHO gets petted, who gets their way, who gets treated special around here.
At this point CJ jumps up and runs out.
I stand up and tell BJ, I am sorry, I cannot talk with your daughter because she is always right, never wrong and always cops an attitude with me. I have to go before I slap the shit out of her and out the door I go.
Later on Stacie comes down the hill. She tells me that BJ will not go looking for CJ because he mad at her because she did not tell him the truth about the cell phone. Wooops. I let the cat or shall we say the cell phone story out of the bag.
BJ was always complaining because CJ seemed to spend all his money. Now he knows where some of it goes...paying Casey off. :) Oh well.
I have family coming for supper. My sister and her family, my brother and his lady...they arrive bringing cake and a meat tray, I have fixed homemade soup and we smile and eat and enjoy each other's company like nothing is wrong. BJ makes it down the hill on his crutches and thanks me for enlightening him on where his money has been going. Eventually Casey comes in. I walk to her, hug her tell her I love her and invite her on into the circle. She is all smiles and light as though nothing has ever happened. Stacie walks over to her and hugs her too. Whether Casey apologizes or not, I don't know. I don't expect one, maybe I should.
But tonight I'm just worn out.
--
Character is what we are, not what others think we are.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
This crazy life
And that ocean front property in Arizona looks better all the time--
Friday we're sitting around the kitchen bar and CJ's phone rings. It's her husband BJ and I hear, "and don't come home". " Do that you stay over there." Various other statements were made leading me to believe he was telling her he was going to do something married men shouldn't do while away from home supposedly working.
Being the mouthy old woman I am, I say very loudly, "BJ, shame on you."
He then crawfishs, saying he was only teasing. I go on and don't think about it again.
Until, I'm sitting at the church on Saturday night eating our dessert after playing dirty Santa. Text message comes in from CJ saying, "Just so you know, a friend of mine is letting me ride with him to Texas to see BJ. I put gas in the truck for Stacie to bring me to Columbia. I love you and I will be home Monday."
Ok
Deed is done, what can I do?
She goes on to say that Stacie has the kids covered.
Sunday comes and goes with no problem.
Monday Stacie takes all the kids to counseling after school. CJ is supposed to be in some time Monday, Stacie has heard from her, but she isn't close yet.
I go to WMU, when I come in around 9, still nothing from CJ.
Tuesday morning Stacie and I leave right after the bus going to Hattiesburg for a psych eval. She has heard from CJ, she and her friend are mad at Stacie because Stacie won't ride to Jackson at midnight and pick CJ up. Last word is the friend will bring CJ home.
By the time we get to Hattiesburg, the friend is bringing her to Hattiesburg. We go to the evaluation, and decide we will check out a new shopping center Stacie has not been in while we wait on CJ. We have about 4 hours to kill before an appointment in Tylertown, an hour away. CJ is to meet us in Hattiesburg within the hour.
Stacie and I have a ball in Pet Smart, Shoe Station and a Ross store, I think it was. We didn't spend much. I bought a spoon rest for a friend of mine for a small Christmas happy. We leave one store and start toward the car and there is CJ, looking a lot worse for wear. By now it's time to leave heading to T-town.
I hear her say she learned to not drink and take her meds.
She ought to know better. She's on all sorts of depression/anxiety/pain,neuropathy type meds and she goes and drinks???
Oh well.
I had looked forward to a day in H'burg just loafing around but I didn't get it. Maybe next time.
CJ sleeps on the way to town, drags out to eat a burger before going to the doctor's office.
Stacie is seeing one of the new doctors in our clinic, since our doctor, Keith Speed is leaving in January to teach. Dr. Kyzer comes in, a short, stocky man, long beard, neat cane, and a pair of five finger shoes on...coolest thing in the world. He spoke softly and slowly and did a very detailed exam of Stacie.He thinks she might have a bit of a thyroid problem and drew blood to check that out.
Then home.............after a haircut of course.
--
Character is what we are, not what others think we are.
Friday we're sitting around the kitchen bar and CJ's phone rings. It's her husband BJ and I hear, "and don't come home". " Do that you stay over there." Various other statements were made leading me to believe he was telling her he was going to do something married men shouldn't do while away from home supposedly working.
Being the mouthy old woman I am, I say very loudly, "BJ, shame on you."
He then crawfishs, saying he was only teasing. I go on and don't think about it again.
Until, I'm sitting at the church on Saturday night eating our dessert after playing dirty Santa. Text message comes in from CJ saying, "Just so you know, a friend of mine is letting me ride with him to Texas to see BJ. I put gas in the truck for Stacie to bring me to Columbia. I love you and I will be home Monday."
Ok
Deed is done, what can I do?
She goes on to say that Stacie has the kids covered.
Sunday comes and goes with no problem.
Monday Stacie takes all the kids to counseling after school. CJ is supposed to be in some time Monday, Stacie has heard from her, but she isn't close yet.
I go to WMU, when I come in around 9, still nothing from CJ.
Tuesday morning Stacie and I leave right after the bus going to Hattiesburg for a psych eval. She has heard from CJ, she and her friend are mad at Stacie because Stacie won't ride to Jackson at midnight and pick CJ up. Last word is the friend will bring CJ home.
By the time we get to Hattiesburg, the friend is bringing her to Hattiesburg. We go to the evaluation, and decide we will check out a new shopping center Stacie has not been in while we wait on CJ. We have about 4 hours to kill before an appointment in Tylertown, an hour away. CJ is to meet us in Hattiesburg within the hour.
Stacie and I have a ball in Pet Smart, Shoe Station and a Ross store, I think it was. We didn't spend much. I bought a spoon rest for a friend of mine for a small Christmas happy. We leave one store and start toward the car and there is CJ, looking a lot worse for wear. By now it's time to leave heading to T-town.
I hear her say she learned to not drink and take her meds.
She ought to know better. She's on all sorts of depression/anxiety/pain,neuropathy type meds and she goes and drinks???
Oh well.
I had looked forward to a day in H'burg just loafing around but I didn't get it. Maybe next time.
CJ sleeps on the way to town, drags out to eat a burger before going to the doctor's office.
Stacie is seeing one of the new doctors in our clinic, since our doctor, Keith Speed is leaving in January to teach. Dr. Kyzer comes in, a short, stocky man, long beard, neat cane, and a pair of five finger shoes on...coolest thing in the world. He spoke softly and slowly and did a very detailed exam of Stacie.He thinks she might have a bit of a thyroid problem and drew blood to check that out.
Then home.............after a haircut of course.
--
Character is what we are, not what others think we are.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
caj
Kids, teenagers...tempers, opinions....
I hate when I allow a child to push my buttons.
This 15 year can do just that. Nothing pleases her. She's always right. She has an answer for everything. She's conniving, manipulative, and sometimes vicious.
She is pissed because Ana copied something she is doing. She refuses to tell me for whatever reason. Just to piss me off, I think. Just because she thinks I always take up for Ana and I do, unless Ana is wrong.
I reminded her that copying is a form of flattery.
She clams up.
She takes the granola bars and special k bars that her mom bought for both of the girls up to the house, leaving Ana with nothing to snack on. She refuses to talk to Ana or me. She accuses Ana of locking herself in the shed but of course she (C) doesn't. She stays with her mom because her mom needs someone to help her and she does that unlike Ana who doesn't care about her mom (according to what C said). Ana pointed out that every time she goes to see her mom, CJ is always piled up on the bed with Stacie. C denies this, of course. C always denies any and everything anyone says that doesn't fit into her realm of what is true.
I pointed out that I didn't like hearing her talk about the shed because it was as much her idea as it was Ana's.
She can't wait until they move. She hates it here. She has hated it here since the first day she walked through my door. She has had an attitude from day one. She uses her mom and the guilt her mom feels for all the things her daughter accuses her of--moving her from Brooklyn school system to Tylertown, moving her from Tylertown to Salem...she hates it here.
I let her get to me. I told her she had always had an attitude and I was tired of it. I told her she didn't like anywhere she was and she yelled back that yes she did. She loved T-town and her grandpa's and she wanted to go back there. She hated it here.
I asked what had Ana done that pissed her. She wouldn't answer. I asked why. She said she didn't want to tell me. She said it was none of my business. I said it was when they brought their angry feelings into my house. I said I could feel the tension and it bothered me. I said I wanted to know because unless I knew I didn't know who to 'side' with, since SHE always accused me of taking Ana's side.
I told her I would tell her mother. She said she didn't care.
She always takes her cell phone to school. They are not supposed to. She got caught last week. Of course it wasn't her fault, she wasn't texting, she was looking for her nose ring in her pocket and the teacher thought she was texting so the teacher searched her. Before school let out she raised enough money from her friends to get the phone back. She calls her mom and her mom has Stacie take her to school to get the money (25.00) and get the phone back. Mom says she won't have her phone for a while. By the time school let out and she got home, mom gave her the phone back. Of course, she has to have the phone. After all she has an alarm on it and she wakes up D and A and S and she has to have it to remind her to take her meds.
Her mom is always accusing A of having a cocky attitude. In fact it is her own daughter who has the attitude.
*sigh*
Can I say I don't know that I like this girl?
I hate when I allow a child to push my buttons.
This 15 year can do just that. Nothing pleases her. She's always right. She has an answer for everything. She's conniving, manipulative, and sometimes vicious.
She is pissed because Ana copied something she is doing. She refuses to tell me for whatever reason. Just to piss me off, I think. Just because she thinks I always take up for Ana and I do, unless Ana is wrong.
I reminded her that copying is a form of flattery.
She clams up.
She takes the granola bars and special k bars that her mom bought for both of the girls up to the house, leaving Ana with nothing to snack on. She refuses to talk to Ana or me. She accuses Ana of locking herself in the shed but of course she (C) doesn't. She stays with her mom because her mom needs someone to help her and she does that unlike Ana who doesn't care about her mom (according to what C said). Ana pointed out that every time she goes to see her mom, CJ is always piled up on the bed with Stacie. C denies this, of course. C always denies any and everything anyone says that doesn't fit into her realm of what is true.
I pointed out that I didn't like hearing her talk about the shed because it was as much her idea as it was Ana's.
She can't wait until they move. She hates it here. She has hated it here since the first day she walked through my door. She has had an attitude from day one. She uses her mom and the guilt her mom feels for all the things her daughter accuses her of--moving her from Brooklyn school system to Tylertown, moving her from Tylertown to Salem...she hates it here.
I let her get to me. I told her she had always had an attitude and I was tired of it. I told her she didn't like anywhere she was and she yelled back that yes she did. She loved T-town and her grandpa's and she wanted to go back there. She hated it here.
I asked what had Ana done that pissed her. She wouldn't answer. I asked why. She said she didn't want to tell me. She said it was none of my business. I said it was when they brought their angry feelings into my house. I said I could feel the tension and it bothered me. I said I wanted to know because unless I knew I didn't know who to 'side' with, since SHE always accused me of taking Ana's side.
I told her I would tell her mother. She said she didn't care.
She always takes her cell phone to school. They are not supposed to. She got caught last week. Of course it wasn't her fault, she wasn't texting, she was looking for her nose ring in her pocket and the teacher thought she was texting so the teacher searched her. Before school let out she raised enough money from her friends to get the phone back. She calls her mom and her mom has Stacie take her to school to get the money (25.00) and get the phone back. Mom says she won't have her phone for a while. By the time school let out and she got home, mom gave her the phone back. Of course, she has to have the phone. After all she has an alarm on it and she wakes up D and A and S and she has to have it to remind her to take her meds.
Her mom is always accusing A of having a cocky attitude. In fact it is her own daughter who has the attitude.
*sigh*
Can I say I don't know that I like this girl?
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
funny contribution, literally, um, well maybe
Our crowds at church on Sunday have always been slim, but given the recent events and the holidays, they are much slimmer. With this in mind, we have opted to not take up an offering on Sunday night. This isn't something that has been presented to the church, it's just one of those things that evolved from circumstances.
Within our church there is one couple, both working on their 2nd marriage. Husband is stiff necked and opinionated and believes that appearance as much as anything makes him spiritual.
Wife has always been mentally unstable and continues to be so.
Husband has been sick with bronchitis so hasn't attended church, although he continues to work every day...something he and wife both have criticized others for doing. Husband wasn't at church Sunday morning nor again Sunday night. Wife walks up to our secretary after the service Sunday with a check in her hand--keep in mind an offering was taken up Sunday morning and wife was present.
She says to the secretary "I just don't know what to do with this check. Husband wrote it this morning and there wasn't an offering taken tonight."
Secretary-"Well, you can do whatever you want with it. You can give it or take it home and give it next Sunday."
Wife, "Yes, but I just don't know what to do."
Secretary, "Like I said, you can give it to me or you can bring it back next Sunday."
Wife, "Yes, but I just don't know, there wasn't an offering taken." Again the secretary said, "You can give it or you can give next Sunday. It doesn't matter to me."
Wife took it back home with her.
--
Character is what we are, not what others think we are.
Within our church there is one couple, both working on their 2nd marriage. Husband is stiff necked and opinionated and believes that appearance as much as anything makes him spiritual.
Wife has always been mentally unstable and continues to be so.
Husband has been sick with bronchitis so hasn't attended church, although he continues to work every day...something he and wife both have criticized others for doing. Husband wasn't at church Sunday morning nor again Sunday night. Wife walks up to our secretary after the service Sunday with a check in her hand--keep in mind an offering was taken up Sunday morning and wife was present.
She says to the secretary "I just don't know what to do with this check. Husband wrote it this morning and there wasn't an offering taken tonight."
Secretary-"Well, you can do whatever you want with it. You can give it or take it home and give it next Sunday."
Wife, "Yes, but I just don't know what to do."
Secretary, "Like I said, you can give it to me or you can bring it back next Sunday."
Wife, "Yes, but I just don't know, there wasn't an offering taken." Again the secretary said, "You can give it or you can give next Sunday. It doesn't matter to me."
Wife took it back home with her.
--
Character is what we are, not what others think we are.
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